I have horrible anxiety when I have to talk to anyone I don't know or more than 10 people in a crowd?

Today I knew my poem was winning the district award for Red Ribbon Week(drug free week) and I was going to have to read it. I was ok, expecting about 50 parents and the other kids who won awards. I got there, walked in the door, and almost started crying. I was hyperventilating, which was making my bronchitis cough so much worse, and begging my mom to take me home. She was going to until my principal walked in the door and waved at me. She came and sat by us, and could tell something was wrong. My mom told her I was sick, and I'm sure I looked like it. My cheeks were flushed, my palms dripping with sweat, my cough was unstoppable, and I was dizzy. She gave me a wink and told me she would get the lady presenting the awards to read my poem for me. I was relieved, but still freaking out. This happens every time I need to present anything, whether it's to my class or the 300 people at the ceremony. What can I do? I tried to make myself do it but I just couldn't.

I have horrible anxiety when I have to talk to anyone I don't know or more than 10 people in a crowd?
It's extreme shyness and it often gets better as you get older. I used to be really shy too, like if a kid on my street said hello to me, I would be too shy to say hello back or use their name, although I don't know why I was so scared. I just was.





The only cure for it is to slowly keep doing it and eventually you will get comfortable. I was the kid who couldn't say high to another kid without sweating with fear, who couldn't even speak loud enough for others to hear, who used to get a stomach ache during round robin reading just thinking about when it was my turn to read, and guess what?





Now I'M the teacher!! Now I have NO problem getting up in front of any classroom of any age and speaking. I'm subbing now and today I had goofball 8th graders. If they sensed uncertainty on my part, they would've eaten me alive, but I have no problems and just think they're goofy now :)





It wasn't always like that. Even though I got over most of my shyness as an adult, when I gave my first lesson to a group of 3rd graders, I broke out into a major sweat. But when you do something day after day, and in front of different people, it just becomes 2nd nature.





Try taking small steps, like saying hello to the employees of the store or the waitress and smiling. Look them in the eye. Later you can talk more to them like asking them for help. It also helps to remember that when you present to your class, the other kids are often just as nervous as you are about presenting. I hope this helps!! :)
Reply:Dear friend. Do not feel alone, the fear of crowds is the most common problem. It is ok to have all those symptoms. It will be so useful if you could talk to a psychiatrist about it. He will help you to cope with this problem. Meanwhile to loose the fear of crowds the best thing you can do is to read and do presentations in front of crowds. The more you do it the more you will build the self confidence. (I am really shy and have learn to manage this, although I still get a little anxious). Good luck. Argentox2@yahoo.com
Reply:You have a misunderstanding of who people are. You see them as short tempered and very judgemental of you. Here are some facts to set things straight in your mind:





1.) People spend 99% of their time thinking about themselves, regarless of the situation or cirumstance. This fact is important because you need to understand that no matter how bad you look or how big a mistake you make people REALLY DONT CARE. They may think, "oh that was a stupid thing she just did." and before the thought is finished they are thinking "I hope I look good right now, is my hair perfect? r those guys looking at me?, uuhg..I have to do so much stuff at home........." and the thoughts trail. NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOU AS MUCH AS YOU DO because they are too busy thinking about how they look. This is something great to remeber when doing any presentations. The truth is, you should really be focusing on HOW TO GET their attention. Honestly, its really hard to make people pay attention to what u r saying or doing. Go to your presentations with confidence, and if the people listen or even remeber what u said or did, u have accomplished a minor miracle.





2.) People like helping other people because it makes them feel like they are doing their job/ deserve to be paid, and it makes them feel important that someone would need their assistance. Next time you have a question or need help with something, ASK! It will make someones day to think that THEY were the ones to help somebody. Just remeber how you feel when somebody asks you for help or comes to you with a question. You feel smart and important. Well people really arent that different from eachother.





Here is a final tip about giving presentations to a large group of people: Do not look directly at any one person. Look right above everyones heads, or at their foreheads. This will appear that you are looking at the audience, but you really wont be. Move your head side to side every once in a while and keep looking at people just above their heads. NOBODY LIKES PEOPLE STARING AT THEM. You should avoid looking at people not because u are afraid to look at them, but because they will feel uncomfortable to have you looking at them.





When u finally have enough practice presenting to people, you can glance at people here and there. You will see something you did not expect. THE MOMENT YOU START TALKING, PEOPLE START THINKING ABOUT OTHER STUFF AND DONT REALLY EVEN LOOK AT YOU. Some people find this discovery discouraging and they usually return to looking above peoples heads. It helps them focus on what they are saying and feel more important than they really are. You will find the bigger the crowd, the less people are really listening to you.
Reply:Your not alone